laying prone too proudly
in a bed of my design
alternate expulsions of cum
and smoke from cigarettes
warm early evening sunshine
narrow through the hall
i came here for myself
i’m just trying to do what’s best for me
i know you are as well
i'm trying to be there
kipling bowl, your choice of clothes
learned attraction to come
leaning over you in bed
you, with scrunched up linen
my chest against the bathroom wall
you, a toothpaste frothy smile
and i came here for myself, i'm
trying to do what’s best for me
i know you are as well
i’m trying to be there
feeling like myself and scared it wouldn't be enough
no chance for all time that i'd hoped would be there
tomato, on conveyor belt
from yonge to sir john a
a mix cd with caribou
and all of public strain
i had a love, human/divine
it was those 2 things all the time
my bun she called me baskame
exchanging thoughts and naked bodies
2 years on, i'm hung up and withdrawn
guilt-ridden forays into girls
babes at the beach
they bask at me
reflecting off my oily body
tomato, on conveyor belt
from yonge to sir john a
a sudden slap directly to
your fleshy inner leg
tomato, on conveyor belt
from yonge to sir john a
i was looking forward to
i can't really say
i don't mind careful, dignified caution
hints supplied, reins are taut
familiar with the pull
maritime harbour
witless bay, avalon peninsula
coming down
camping in the goulds
second time quickly brushed aside my sense of doubt
ill-advised frequency and size
the ceiling low
prompted by closeness to me in regent park
the neighbourhood allows a moment of palms together
couldn't find patience, nevermind two days
undefined motion through limits of control
i’d love to have control
i wade ankle deep into every great lake
and all my pals are soaking wet
from swimming (in a tiny pond)
it's a lot of water that i'm standing in
i only know: how warm it is, the sand grit
at least my feet are sensitive
others know:
the lakes i've been in,
number,
volume
not how deep i went
those details make me seem like a limnologist
fear of water cool on new skin
holds me to a single depth
but in the water all my pals are beautiful
i was born to swim and swim,
with nerves required to dive in
in the water my father was beautiful
pals everywhere
pals
beautiful pals
credits
released December 31, 2018
songs by Balmy
recorded and mixed by Sebastian Palfery
mastered by Ron Skinner - Heading North
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